Saturday, February 19, 2011

It's Not Like Years Ago, the Fear of Getting Caught

A lovely song by Michael Stipe about skinny dipping outside of Athens, GA and somewhat analogous here I guess.  Mostly I just heard it on the way to work the other day and it put me in a peaceful mood.  And sham on me for waiting this long to have an REM lyric title as they are probably my all time favorite band.  But of course it’s always hard to decipher the lyrics so maybe that is why I have not used any thus far J

After getting back home from our weekend wedding trip I was delighted to see an e-mail in my inbox Monday morning from Sandra with her telephone number.  She said to call around 2 pm.  Of course that made the day longer in anticipation of that first conversation.  At 2:05 pm I called (didn’t want to seem too eager) but the number was not in service L  I e-mailed and apparently she had transposed a number so I redialed and a very pleasant voice said “hello” at the other end.

From our AM notes it seemed like we already knew each other well from similar experiences in similar areas of the country.

She told me several old war stories from her travels as an airline attendant.  One was an interesting story about being fondled by a famous TV sports analyst that she viewed as really comical (I guess because the person in question has become somewhat of a caricature over the years).  Anyway, all her stories were very interesting and again I found myself listening more than talking.

She also talked at length about her many animals that were in fact her “children.”

Unlike Alecia, Sandra didn’t have probing questions for me.  She seemed to accept why I was on AM.  She was more interested in my career, hobbies, life experiences, etc.  The conversation was very relaxing and enjoyable and didn’t have that interview-feel that you tend to get in this type of environment.

Of course we did trade some AM war stories.  I said I had met one lady but didn’t reveal that we had sex.  I said we had many aspects of our lives in common for this small area and decided not to move on.  That is probably the truth from Alecia’s perspective so it was not an outright misrepresentation from mine J

From Sandra’s telling she had apparently met about three men.  Most seemed older and fairly affluent.  Sandra also said she was on AM because she had recently ended an affair with an older, foreign man.  And through this discourse I realized that she understood “the paradox of local,” meaning it is better to meet halfway than to have an affair with the girl/boy next door.  Of course the war stories flowed into admissions on our part about our profiles.  I came clean and admitted that I was 3 years older than my profile (only off by 7% of actual age and well within acceptable limits I believe) J

Luckily, Sandra didn’t flinch at all; in fact she said she was actually 49.  Oh cool, she doesn’t mind my little misrepresentation!   Wait, did she say 49 as in 40 + 9!  Gulp, that’s a bit different from the 41 that was on her profile.

Hmm…, I wrote previously that Suzanne was older than me and a grandmother and that felt odd so how do I feel now?

Yes! Yes!  I know, so now you are thinking me a total creep and hypocrite.  It’s OK for the guy to chase younger women but let a woman in her late 40’s chase a younger man and something is wrong so she is referred to as a Cougar!  Ryan you are a total JERK!

Well, I agree, please read on as of course this story has been an education from the start.  And I am always for playing Devil's Advocate even when I aim it at myself!

In fact I didn’t linger on the thought of her being older and a grandmother for long because she was so interesting.  Sandra did say she listed herself as 41 because she didn't want "dirty old men" writing to her.  So that made me feel good; obviously I am neither "dirty" or "old!"

Toward the end of our call Sandra said she would send more pictures which she did.  Now I mentioned earlier about being careful with pictures.  Certainly many women will send pictures that are not at all like they are in real life (e.g. the picture is 10 years or 20 pounds old).  But with Sandra I learned the opposite can be true.  Her profile picture on AM was OK.  After e-mailing a few times she sent me another picture that again was at best OK.  But unlike Suzanne there was just something about her.  Something told me to move forward.  Sandra said later that she purposefully sent poor pictures to test if men were really interested – a good strategy!

So at the end of our conversation we set a date for a late lunch on Wednesday at a Chili’s type place in a town between us.  So things look good!

Over the next few days I found myself “googling” late 40-something actresses.  You know Michelle Phieffer, Rene Russo, Sharon Stone, Julianne Moore all around 50 and all hot – this might be good, and I am always an advocate for education!  I do call her Sandra here because she looks a bit like Sandra Bullock, although she says she hates when people tell her she looks like Sandra Bullock.  However, for Halloween apparently she always goes as Marilyn Monroe which I do believe she can pull off!  Except at 5 foot 10 she is much taller.

1 comment:

Sweet Lou said...

I find it interesting that people don't put their accurate age and other information. I kinda see Sandra's point. But the truth is, no matter what age a woman puts, she's going to deal with creeps in some form or fashion.

If I were you, put completely accurate information and up to date photos. If a woman is not forthcoming, you have reason to dump her.

One more reason, is AM is a total crapshoot. For as many people who want a single love partner, others just want to get fucked, and some more want to get fucked by a bunch. Of course, the prevailing majority are just curious.

So, just be accurate IMO. Not being accurate isn't going to increase your chances.

Enjoy the blog btw. Just have been to busy to comment until now!