I am a very regular guy. I am mid-40’s, married 15 years, and have 2 kids and live in the DC area. Additionally, although I minored in English and my dream job would have been a sportswriter, writing a blog is the last thing you would expect of me. And that is all I will say about my normal life for now. Because the other last thing you would expect of me is the second life I have been living the last six months.
Last April on a Friday evening before Easter I wandered upstairs to watch TV as the rest of the family had monopolized something on the other. I turned to CNN and casually watched not expecting anything particularly interesting. That night CNN was interviewing a Noel Bitterman. It took me a few minutes to figure out what they were talking about. What it was, was a website called Ashley Madison, a dating site for married men and women who want to cheat on their spouse. Now of course at this point you are thinking I am a total jerk. However, I remind you I am not telling my past story at this point and all I will say is it was a long trip to where I sat in front of that TV that night. But by the end of the interview I had one of those ah-ha moments that truly changed my world.
Conveniently I was working the next day so I had some alone time in my office to do some “googling.” At first I “googled” Ashley Morgan somehow mixing what I had watched last night with a brand of bourbon/porn star. Obviously I found nothing. But after thinking and “googling” some more I finally found Ashley Madison. I clicked on the link http://www.ashleymadison.com/ and soon saw such a great invitation – “life is short, have an affair.” Down and to the left you see “as seen on Ellen, Dr. Phil, Larry King, etc.,” so obviously this is legit! And just to the right they ask for your relationship status. Click the dropdown button and ta da (!) – yes I would like to be an “attached male seeking females.” And there is even an Affair Guarantee (which we can discuss later). Just to the right is the “begin” button. So I clicked and began my profile.
I have been on Facebook for about 5 years (proudly a little ahead of the curve there) so I was fairly knowledgeable about navigating through a social media site. First I type in all my information town, zip, birthday, etc. Now, I am a rookie at this point so I am honest on all of these answers, we’ll talk more about that later. Next section – name and caption; and again, not considering discretion I type in my name and the year I graduated college. That is taken so Ashley Madison gives you boilerplate suggestions. I settle on Ryan20002010 (not my real name of course – I have learned the meaning of discretion over the past few months)! Caption, hmm I leave blank for now but I bet a good song lyric would sum up the message I want to communicate to the female world but I can look up some Pearl Jam lyrics later. Weight, height, body type, smoking habits all answered honestly with more to come on those later. Pictures, I pull a few off Facebook that are not too clear but keep private. I at least know that at this point. And finally I go though the Intimate Desires, Perfect Match, and Personal Interests sections. For now I just check off honestly and don’t add any comments, I can do that later. What I am really itching to do is see who is out there!