to Sassy for her literary guidance and editing of a guy who still doesn't seem to right write even with spellcheck! :)
Chapter 4 - Loved by Many and Hated by None
The funny thing was that Ryan didn't think Sandee was really real. He thought she was someone teasing him, perhaps one of those bloggers or maybe someone that was not even a wife but was playing tricks on this funny social net-thing everybody talked about. Sandee even told Ryan she was only 26, much younger than Ryan was now that he was into his 40's. But she made him feel like a young husband.
But a curious thing began to happen. Because Ryan did not think Sandee real he wrote to her often in jest. He wrote to her as silly Ryan not the young husband he had been for so many years. "I have nothing to lose," he would think to myself so I'll just write what I want to her and try to be funny. Ryan thought himself clever to be writing in this new persona. He thought himself the trickster not the tricked. But in time Ryan began to realize that he was in fact not writing to Sandee in some trumped up fake personality that indeed this was who he wanted to be; nee who he was now. For Ryan no longer wanted to be the vain and stern plain career husband, or even to only be the sad lumpy home husband, he did in fact enjoy the jestful play with Sandee, it gave him energy!
The biggest jest of all was that in all this trickery he was beginning to find himself, the young husband HE wanted to be now.
Sometimes Ryans's new jests would spill over to home. Shannon would sometimes press a smile or a light giggle but then return to her work. Shannon did not notice this new husband nor care that anything new existed in Ryan at all. He almost felt like that Velveteen Rabbit he read about once that had grown into a new real rabbit and while happy to be real could not longer speak to his past life.
Two long months went by and Ryan had still not met Sandee. But he still looked forward to her notes every day. One day Ryan caught Sandee in one of her fibs. He thought "now I have you, now I'll get to the bottom of this." The funny thing though, he was not angered, he was enchanted and longed to know who this silly funny person was. In fact Sandee made Ryan silly and funny and he liked it. He felt sure no matter what Sandee looked or acted like in person as long as she made him feel silly and funny he would like her.
Finally Sandee agreed to meet Ryan. Ryan was more nervous than he had been even with Alecia. He had such hopes. As Sandee stepped out of her car Ryan was immediately enamored of her. "Oh my", he said, what a beautiful woman with long golden hair. If in reality she can be as sunny and happy as her notes and her long beautiful hair then she may be who Ryan had sought all this time.
Sandee was a bit more timid than Ryan had expected in person, she of course was nervous too. But soon they began meeting weekly for lunch, or coffee, or just a walk along a river.
Once Ryan and Sandee went on a boat ride. Ryan was acting very vain and wanting to impress Sandee. And then he went splash into the river. Ryan was mortified. Oh the tongue lashing he would have gotten from Shannon. Sandee and Ryan labored to get to the waters edge. They looked at each other and then just burst out in laughter. Ryan was happy, he could be silly and funny with Sandee and that was surely what he had been looking for.
You might ask yourself did Sandee think Ryan pretty. And your answer would be yes, she did in fact like Ryan very much. It made Ryan so glad to be adored again. She often told Ryan how kind he was. This was new to him. Of course many now had told him he was pretty, many had said he was smart, many had said he was going places. But funny? Kind? These were new things to Ryan. But it made him feel good to be thought of in this manner.
Once Sandee and Ryan went out to lunch and had soup but they didn't stay at the restaurant they took it to a place called a hotel where you could have lunch in private. Ryan enjoyed this very much. From that point on they often talked about how much they enjoyed soup lunches.
But Sandee had a mean husband and she thought she might need to leave him. Ryan was not sure if he could leave Shannon. Though Sandee didn't ask anything of Ryan, Ryan started thinking about if he should move on in life. Then again, he thought if he could not, perhaps he should let Sandee go her own way.
Of course the thought of not seeing Sandee now did concern Ryan, he didn't want to lose her after just finding her.
After the holiday's Sandee did say that perhaps she should move on. This time Ryan had no desire to go back into that Ashley Madison world. Ryan asked Sandee if they could just remain friends and Sandee said yes. For some time they did just meet for breakfast or for a walk. But before too long they decided perhaps another soup date would be nice. And once they went on another soup date they decided perhaps this friendship is just too nice to walk away from just yet.
And so it was that Ryan and Sandee spent their days through a very mild yet blissful winter.
or perhaps to be continued some day when his journey is toward's it's terminus (if the world doesn't end) or maybe never..... :)