Thursday, March 17, 2011

She Took Me to the Garden Just for a Little Walk

So can anyone tell me the name of the group who sang those lyrics?  Hint: they were essentially the Jonas Brothers of their era, teen heartthrobs.  But their music was heavily influenced by the Byrds and this particular song has a very Flying Burrito Brothers quality which means I love it!

OK, so today is a great day to write a blog entry.  For all of you non-Americans none of us are working today and I mean that literally!  Today and tomorrow are statistically the least productive American work days for the entire year (see below):

So for me why stop at watching basketball all afternoon, I may as well screw off all morning writing a blog entry as well J

So what are your Final Four teams?  Mine are Duke, Ohio State, Kansas, and St. John’s with Kansas beating Ohio State in the final.

OK, the actual point of today’s blog is to get back to my Sandra story which is why I chose the lyrics above.  If you don’t remember Sandra here is another introduction (here).

If you don’t want to re-read, Sandra is a 5’10” blond bombshell/48 year old “trophy wife” I met on AM and we have had our first date.  The following week I had to go to the left side of the country for a family vacation so there was no immediate second date.  But during that week on the right side of the country Sandra had her 49th birthday so I did send her an e-card and stayed in touch via e-mail.

When I got back to the right side of the country I called Sandra and we had a great talk about our weeks and set our second date for a picnic at that country store place I was going to take Alecia to back in May.  Sandra had been there and it was one of her favorite places as well!

So we meet there.  This is a country store that has been turned into an upscale wine, cheese, and gourmet food shop.  Across the road is an old mill with a beautiful little stream and a picnic area.  We have lunch and spend at least an hour just talking.  After, we drive about 2 miles to this old church and take a walk through an old graveyard.  No I’m not a necrophiliac; Sandra likes old graveyards – its fun figuring out the family histories through gravestones.  The old church is pretty secluded so before we leave we enjoy a very long passionate kiss in Sandra’s car.  I love it when someone I am comfortable with runs their fingers through my hair.  Sandra’s right hand was in my hair and her left between my legs as we kissed.  I ran my hands over her knees and delicately progressed up her legs.  I met no roadblocks as I went inside of her skirt.  This was wonderful but alas not quite the place for sex so we stopped there for now.

My story is now in August and that tends to be a very busy time for me, and not a great time for affairs.  The following week I really wanted to see Sandra but couldn’t really afford to drive any length of time to see her.  So Sandra drove up to see me one evening which was a bit of risk given my small town.  We did have dinner at an out of the way place I was fairly sure I would not see any acquaintances.  After, we drove around the area and did stop in town.  There are a lot of nice boutique shops that I thought Sandra would enjoy.  Two funny things happened then that were great lessons.

We parked on the street in town and walked to the other side to see 2 shops I though Sandra would like to just window shop.  Additionally, the sky was looking very ominous as a storm was nearing.  As we walked about 100 yards away from the car the sky simply open up and it started pouring!  We dashed under a small eve outside of one shop for some temporary though not perfect cover.  I turned to look inside the shop (I know the owner) and there inside was a little girl that is a friend of my daughter L  And of course the little girl says “that’s *******’s dad.”  Luckily, I don’t think anyone really paid attention to her and in my job I could simply be meeting with someone, we were not holding hands or kissing so I was OK but big lesson learned (NO MORE MEETING IN MY BACKYARD).

But the other lesson was much better but first we had to get across the street and out of the rain.  So I offer to get the car and drive over.  Sandra gives me the keys and I run across; drenched by the time I get to her car.  I get in a try to start the car.  Now I like to try to portray myself a suave and distinguished in this blog but unfortunately that is not always the case.  Sandra as I said previously has one of those very expensive European style cars and stupid me has no clue how to start it.  So I have to run back across the street, getting further drenched and ask how to start it.  Apparently you put the key in the side near the gear rather than near the steering wheel.  Anyway I get the car started, pull across the street, and pick Sandra up.  While sparing Sandra a little she is still very wet and I am drenched.

But the lesson?  OK, in my marital experience if something I did with Shannon such as show her a shop delayed her as little as a nanosecond and that nanosecond caused her to have one drop of rain hit her head she would have “torn me a new butt hole” as they say down here.  As Billy Crystal says in “When Harry Met Sally,” “You’re the worst kind, you think you’re low maintenance but you’re really high maintenance.”

Now, compare that to Sandra.  First, you need to get a real good visual on Sandra.  This is an immaculately put together woman; I guess the best analogy would be Samantha from Sex and the City.

But as we pull away both sopping wet we just have the best laugh.  And so ends our third date.

Next week would be busy again only time for a quick lunch in a town between us (this time) but things are looking good so far.


Anonymous said...

Kansas is a fine pick for the trophy. Seeing as how they beat us for the championship a few years ago. Which was good I guess that we lost because they wiped that season off the books because of our coach (yeah think on it and you will know where I'm from). But he's gone now and our coach is hotter than yours!! Lol.

We won't make it past the first round but hey we are just glad to be there.

Ryan Beaumont said...

I'm not a Kansas fan, just think they will win.

You would of course be speaking of Memphis and the coach would be Coach Cal who is now at Kentucky.

Now I feel bad for picking Arizona over you :(

LOVE MEMPHIS Btw! What a great town!

Anonymous said...

Why Ryan you are very perceptive!

Shame on you for picking Arizona!


Ryan Beaumont said...

Sorry about your Tigers today.

But Memphis is more fun than Tempe any day of the week!

Wish I could be on Beal St. with you or hangin' out with the ducks at the Peabody!