Thursday, April 14, 2011

Should (Twenty) **** (Eight) % Appear too Small, Be Thankful I don't take it all.

'Cause I’m the taxman, Yeah, I’m the taxman

I hate that I received such a wonderful compliment earlier this week from Prowling with Kat and then follow with a dopey posting.  But I had this on my “to do” list so here goes.  And I will write a more appropriate response to Kat a little later.

But for now Kat, I very heartfelt thank you!

Yes tomorrow is Tax Day in America, the ultimate “anti-holiday.”  So in celebration of the $1,900 additional chunk Uncle Sam is taking out of my rear end I thought I would write a celebratory post!

But don’t worry; I’m not a wing nut so this won’t be any tea party rant.  I think I said once I’m a left of center/Bill Clinton kind of guy.  I would say I like the current Pres but Bill and I are BBQ eaten, lecherous, skirt chasin,’ southerners so I feel a kindred spirit with him!  A rare bread of straight southern male WASP’s that are blue’s.  Yes, I proudly walk to the beat of a different drummer!  OK, enough politics.

So here’s the deal.  Rather than take my $1,900 and drop another bomb on the Middle East, why don’t you let me keep it and really stimulate the economy!  Come on Mr. Pres, I know you really are a Keynesian (as in John Maynard Keynes, father of public sector macroeconomic monetary policy; not Kenya).  So if you monetize me, I’ll make it work for the greater good!   :)

Here are some of the things I could do and the outcomes:

  • Ashley Madison – spend more money and allow Noel Bitterman to move into a bigger house thus stimulating the housing sector and helping all the skilled workers that will build the house
  • Hotel Industry – Meet more women on AM, spend more time in hotel rooms thus stimulating this sagging sector.  And with all the sheets I’ll tear up it will help the textile industry as well
  • Restaurant Industry – I’m a classy guy, I always like to take my special ladies out to lunch so think of the help here and I’m a good tipper as well so it will help the waitron as well (bet you didn’t know the neutered word for restaurant servers).
  • Big Oil - Yes, let's throw some more money to the oil/gas sector with all those miles I drive to my encounters!
  • Wine Industry - I love to bring a bottle to any hotel encounter, can you say Northern Coast Pinot!  Yes, Northern California has been hit very hard by the economic downturn so any California Red's I buy will be a big boost.
And most importantly for Womankind….

I think you know the answer here!  My goodness, the amount of stimulus I could deliver to the women of the world……Priceless!    J

Sorry, I know I’m a smart ass!

And I guess that was all politics but a little sexy don’t you think!

I promise some cliffhangers in my Sandra and Shannon stories next week. 

2 comments:

France said...

Hmm, that is pretty clever - great idea! You should at least try to suggest that one to the IRS. Or maybe they should actually try some of what you suggested... they'd be more enjoyable and less stuck up. (you're not working for the IRS, are you? LOL)

Kat said...

Ryan,
Very clever post! I love your ideas about how you would stimulate the ecomony and womankind. Can I volunteer? A little additional stimulation is always welcome. ;)